I'm currently living on a chunk of 81 acres owned by a fascinating retired couple outside of Pueblo Colorado. Especially Joyce. Joyce is in her 70's yet has the energy and expressiveness of a 7 year old girl. She's full of knowledge and conversation is always interesting and engaging.
This is a journal entry about a day I had here.
Day, time, and year is of no use here
I worked on taking apart a wood vessel that housed a pump that two years prior they attempted to use to pipe spring water up the ravine to their home. On my way down I crushed up some wild sage and other herbs in my hands and took in all the nuanced fragrances. One of my favorite ways to get to know a new area. I saw a snake down by the wood vessel and tried to catch it, to no avail.
Later in the afternoon I made some delicious lunch in my trailer and then went down for a swim in the sublimely cool river. It was so refreshing after having to take about 9 loads up and down the meandering trail up to the top of the ravine. I explored different parts of the river, eventually taking off my suit to slather my entire body with some dark rich black mud. Why not? It feels good. I am a child of the Earth, not this synthetic and artificial world that man has created (which is just causing disease and suffering under the illusion that it's making our lives better and easier). As I'm taking a look around along the river, completely black, smelling the different scents of plants and flowers, I came across a little green bog. Several water spiders skittering across the surface. I see a scorpion a few inches underwater, creeping below a rock, and then it attempts to grab one of the spiders from below, yet it just sinks out of sight. Ha! A rookie in training, kinda like me in this life. I watched it try yet again, but another epic fail ensued.
Floating in the river, limbs outstretched, looking up at the clouds, with my ears underwater enjoying silence and lightness. A huge flock of swallows flying all around up above me, and two hawks swoop in to join the fun. I have a very special and dear connection with swallows that I don't care to explain right now, but everywhere I travel, they are there to greet me. Singing and dancing through the air.
Laying on the warm rocks as the clouds let up for a while. Blissfully naked. Seeing several different colored butterflies. Just breathing. Contemplating. As I slowly made my way back to where I came in at, slithering and sneaking up the river like a crocodile, I noticed a dragonfly perched on a rock. I came about 6 inches from its face, observing its hypnotic blue colors and luminescent eyes. What a beauty. Hiking back up the hill after a few hours feeling thoroughly refreshed. Finished a book I started two days ago and then read 150 pages into the the next volume. The Ringing Cedars Series by Vladamir Megre. A fascinating read. Hearing a storm come in, listening to the sounds of nature as I'm reading a book saturated with the kind of relationship that is possible with the Self and Nature. Taking a look to my left and seeing a glorious rainbow, which was gone 5 minutes later.
As I'm getting ready for bed watching a wild thunderstorm in the distance. Writing all this down and still, flashes of brilliant light scattering across the sky.
Joyce explained to me an Awakening experience she had in Hawaii while in the rainforest where she was contemplating what she knew for sure in this life, and what she kinda thought she knew, and then all the sudden her vision split into two and she entered a state of consciousness where she merged with the Whole and became everything as it is. She understood instantaneously who we are and how we function. After the experience she went running to her husband full of a joyous energy, but as is usually the case, he didn't have real understanding or any idea what she was talking about. It was her subjective experience. After this Awakening as she calls it, she found it difficult to live in this illusory world for a while.
I can relate in so many ways, not only to the state of consciousness she experienced but the coming back into the body and identity and how hard it can be to integrate these experiences. Nothing touches the peace and love and freedom of the magical enlightened/awakened/spiritual experience.
A couple examples of my own...
When I was in the Mojave desert and I ate some very pure psychedelic mushrooms. The simple act of eating a blood orange as if it was the first piece of fruit I've ever eaten in my entire life was pure joy. Biting into the peel and flesh, so juicy and sensual. Citrus juice bursting through my mouth absolutely singing to my body and mind.
Stopping to look at a singular purple desert flower, gently picking it and holding it in front of me, roots still attached, and tears rolling down my face because my heart exploded with love. The pure beauty of the flower reflecting back the pure beauty of my own heart. And as I'm writing this, recalling that moment, those intimate feelings, that connection, tears are filling up in my eyes so that I can barely see.
Just sitting on the earth and breathing. There is a feeling like the deepest most profound cosmic wind blowing all the illusion out of me. And then witnessing a string of moments of pure consciousness untainted by my biology and hardwiring. A fly flew by and the sound seemed to echo throughout all of space and time. I was absorbed in such intense stillness. Words don't do it justice. Words never could.
Stopping for a rest, sitting down, my mind empty but open to all, and my eyes are drawn to a singular ant on the ground. And then unconsciously my whole being started vibrating, as if tuning into a different kind of receiver. As the tuner inside me kept bumping up a notch, like the receiver on a television or radio, I started spontaneously humming, my voice getting higher and higher until finally, I was vibrating at the same frequency of the ant. Wow! Such wonder! I remained intensely focused on the ant (all the while humming) for about 20 seconds but that's all I could take. The ant energy is so speedy!
I feel it necessary to note on the puritanical beliefs that an altered state of mind through the use of plants and fungi is in someway "evil" or "sinful" is just downright destructive. There is no definitive or set way to have a "spiritual" experience, and it is my opinion that to think otherwise, you are only limiting the Source of all creation itself by believing that only under such and such conditions will you have a spiritual experience. That is black and white dogma in action. An experience is an experience, and just because someone (like me) is under the influence of a mind/soul/heart altering substance does not discount it in any way.
Here is a part of the dilemma I'm in at the moment. Technology and the internet has been hardwired into me from a young age. It is fused into my biology, and I don't know why I seem to always be the first to point the obvious out, but this shit is addictive! Nature is my true home. To be disconnected from Nature means being disconnected from the Source and my own true nature. What do I do then? Travel around like a nomad living in off the grid communities? Build a sanctuary with my bare hands in some pristine land? Hop on a plane and go live in ashrams and Hindu/Buddhist temples all over Southeast Asia and India like a wandering ascetic? All are possibilities. Yet, I always seem to get sucked back into the technology void, You just can't avoid it living in the modern age.
This is a journal entry about a day I had here.
Day, time, and year is of no use here
I worked on taking apart a wood vessel that housed a pump that two years prior they attempted to use to pipe spring water up the ravine to their home. On my way down I crushed up some wild sage and other herbs in my hands and took in all the nuanced fragrances. One of my favorite ways to get to know a new area. I saw a snake down by the wood vessel and tried to catch it, to no avail.
Later in the afternoon I made some delicious lunch in my trailer and then went down for a swim in the sublimely cool river. It was so refreshing after having to take about 9 loads up and down the meandering trail up to the top of the ravine. I explored different parts of the river, eventually taking off my suit to slather my entire body with some dark rich black mud. Why not? It feels good. I am a child of the Earth, not this synthetic and artificial world that man has created (which is just causing disease and suffering under the illusion that it's making our lives better and easier). As I'm taking a look around along the river, completely black, smelling the different scents of plants and flowers, I came across a little green bog. Several water spiders skittering across the surface. I see a scorpion a few inches underwater, creeping below a rock, and then it attempts to grab one of the spiders from below, yet it just sinks out of sight. Ha! A rookie in training, kinda like me in this life. I watched it try yet again, but another epic fail ensued.
Floating in the river, limbs outstretched, looking up at the clouds, with my ears underwater enjoying silence and lightness. A huge flock of swallows flying all around up above me, and two hawks swoop in to join the fun. I have a very special and dear connection with swallows that I don't care to explain right now, but everywhere I travel, they are there to greet me. Singing and dancing through the air.
Laying on the warm rocks as the clouds let up for a while. Blissfully naked. Seeing several different colored butterflies. Just breathing. Contemplating. As I slowly made my way back to where I came in at, slithering and sneaking up the river like a crocodile, I noticed a dragonfly perched on a rock. I came about 6 inches from its face, observing its hypnotic blue colors and luminescent eyes. What a beauty. Hiking back up the hill after a few hours feeling thoroughly refreshed. Finished a book I started two days ago and then read 150 pages into the the next volume. The Ringing Cedars Series by Vladamir Megre. A fascinating read. Hearing a storm come in, listening to the sounds of nature as I'm reading a book saturated with the kind of relationship that is possible with the Self and Nature. Taking a look to my left and seeing a glorious rainbow, which was gone 5 minutes later.
As I'm getting ready for bed watching a wild thunderstorm in the distance. Writing all this down and still, flashes of brilliant light scattering across the sky.
My home
Their home, which they built by themselves.
My backyard!
This little squirmy guy will turn into a beautiful butterfly in the fall.
The place I relax and explore everyday after work.
Joyce explained to me an Awakening experience she had in Hawaii while in the rainforest where she was contemplating what she knew for sure in this life, and what she kinda thought she knew, and then all the sudden her vision split into two and she entered a state of consciousness where she merged with the Whole and became everything as it is. She understood instantaneously who we are and how we function. After the experience she went running to her husband full of a joyous energy, but as is usually the case, he didn't have real understanding or any idea what she was talking about. It was her subjective experience. After this Awakening as she calls it, she found it difficult to live in this illusory world for a while.
I can relate in so many ways, not only to the state of consciousness she experienced but the coming back into the body and identity and how hard it can be to integrate these experiences. Nothing touches the peace and love and freedom of the magical enlightened/awakened/spiritual experience.
A couple examples of my own...
When I was in the Mojave desert and I ate some very pure psychedelic mushrooms. The simple act of eating a blood orange as if it was the first piece of fruit I've ever eaten in my entire life was pure joy. Biting into the peel and flesh, so juicy and sensual. Citrus juice bursting through my mouth absolutely singing to my body and mind.
Stopping to look at a singular purple desert flower, gently picking it and holding it in front of me, roots still attached, and tears rolling down my face because my heart exploded with love. The pure beauty of the flower reflecting back the pure beauty of my own heart. And as I'm writing this, recalling that moment, those intimate feelings, that connection, tears are filling up in my eyes so that I can barely see.
Just sitting on the earth and breathing. There is a feeling like the deepest most profound cosmic wind blowing all the illusion out of me. And then witnessing a string of moments of pure consciousness untainted by my biology and hardwiring. A fly flew by and the sound seemed to echo throughout all of space and time. I was absorbed in such intense stillness. Words don't do it justice. Words never could.
Stopping for a rest, sitting down, my mind empty but open to all, and my eyes are drawn to a singular ant on the ground. And then unconsciously my whole being started vibrating, as if tuning into a different kind of receiver. As the tuner inside me kept bumping up a notch, like the receiver on a television or radio, I started spontaneously humming, my voice getting higher and higher until finally, I was vibrating at the same frequency of the ant. Wow! Such wonder! I remained intensely focused on the ant (all the while humming) for about 20 seconds but that's all I could take. The ant energy is so speedy!
I feel it necessary to note on the puritanical beliefs that an altered state of mind through the use of plants and fungi is in someway "evil" or "sinful" is just downright destructive. There is no definitive or set way to have a "spiritual" experience, and it is my opinion that to think otherwise, you are only limiting the Source of all creation itself by believing that only under such and such conditions will you have a spiritual experience. That is black and white dogma in action. An experience is an experience, and just because someone (like me) is under the influence of a mind/soul/heart altering substance does not discount it in any way.
Here is a part of the dilemma I'm in at the moment. Technology and the internet has been hardwired into me from a young age. It is fused into my biology, and I don't know why I seem to always be the first to point the obvious out, but this shit is addictive! Nature is my true home. To be disconnected from Nature means being disconnected from the Source and my own true nature. What do I do then? Travel around like a nomad living in off the grid communities? Build a sanctuary with my bare hands in some pristine land? Hop on a plane and go live in ashrams and Hindu/Buddhist temples all over Southeast Asia and India like a wandering ascetic? All are possibilities. Yet, I always seem to get sucked back into the technology void, You just can't avoid it living in the modern age.
